Friday, December 9, 2011

When your'e gone

I miss my old self and I wonder if I could help recreate those wonderful memories. I want to be there when everything important happened. I wish I could tell my old self that it gets better and to turn things in and that a DE isn't that great. Re-do things and make them better.
Memories are lost the second that they go by and they can never be repeated. But laugh when needed and cry when there is a shoulder. Take the pictures and write the needed words.
Dance was so hard. I'm not that good with learning new material so when I had to learn and entire new dance, it was torture. I can get it after a while but I feel bad saying, "I need that to be repeated." Doing it over again extra times when I feel that everyone else is getting it the first couple of times.
My grandparents are leaving in January. That is so soon but America is their second home. English is their second language. If it wasn't for the grand kids and their sons, I don't think that they would even come to America after my grandfather retired. They might not even come here any more. Every year, they stay here shorter and shorter. Sometimes it's just days shorter but that makes a difference. Leaving in January and coming back in like September.
So, is this what life is going to be like? Leaving and entering life over and over again? Knowing that you are going to come back but then never do? That's how I feel sometimes. You leave but then your back and I don't want you any more. The cycle repeats.
I am grateful for Advil and icepacks
I am grateful for Ferris Bueller
I am grateful for pillows
I am grateful for headphones
I am grateful for The Brady Bunch
I am grateful for U2 and Greenday
I am grateful for Katie and old cameras
I am grateful for simple moments and resting places
I am grateful for Alissa
I am grateful for Peter, Michele and Melanie
Thank you for listening

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